To love is not to possess
by Bonnichiwa
Summary: In which Valygar asks Kaylee to run away with him. Set during ToB and based off Kulyok's wonderful Valygar Romance for the Romantic Encounters Mod.


_**Author's Note:**_ _This fic is inspired by Kulyok's beautifully written Valygar's friendly romantic path in the Romantic Encounters mod. I absolutely adored it, and I was so glad to FINALLY be able to romance Valygar! My only complaint is that it made me want more, so I've just fleshed out most of the scenes using my own imagination, plus added my own take on how it may have happened with my own Bhaalspawn. I have a second chapter in the works, but so far this remains a oneshot._

 _Thanks for reading!_

* * *

The camp fire burnt low, the embers cackling, the heat of the Amkethran desert providing enough warmth for the campsite. Kaylee called for a rest after Abazigal's defeat, though she was far too exhausted to summon her divine plane, so they had taken refuge outside of the enclave. The battle against her draconic sibling had cost them in supplies and vigour; Sarevok had taken a particularly nasty blow that had cracked several of his ribs, Jaheira and Anomen had almost completely exhausted their spells and Mazzy had a minor burn on her arm which had required the rest of their salves.

The night was slowly waning to the light of day as Kaylee sat by the dying embers, combing her blonde locks in preparation for the day ahead. She had left her bed roll nearly a half hour ago to relieve Valygar of his watch, though despite her protesting that he should get some more sleep while he could, he had refused, instead opting to keep her company on the final watch. She had smiled at the ranger, knowing any protest would be met with a raised eyebrow and a slight smirk that she had come to adore. So she had sat herself next to the stubborn man and they had shared a companionable silence, the warmth of his shoulder pressing against her own for a time as he tended to his katana.

The sun was peeking over the horizon when Valygar finally spoke, his voice quiet and low, "Kaylee, let's run away together."

Her comb stilled as her heart skipped a beat, Kaylee raised her glance to her companion, his blade and whetstone in front of him forgotten for a moment as he turned his dark gaze upon her. Eyes widening, she stammered out a hesitant reply.

"I-you- what?!"

He chuckled, his hopeful smile leaving her bereft of any coherent thought his initial suggestion had not yet stripped away, "I know it's sudden. But I did tell you I could no longer hide how I feel from you, love. And with our final battles approaching, I want to have something to look forward to after it's all over. So, will you run away with me?"

"W-what? Do you know what you're asking?" she gaped.

He did. Very much so. She had come along and changed his entire outlook on not only magic, but life, ever since she entered his cabin that fateful day several months ago.

* * *

 _Sensing an intruder, Valygar quickly rose from his chair by the fireplace, his blade drawn as soon as his door swung open. The first intruder – a mage, if her equipment was any indication - to enter the cabin looked no older than 20, a human, her lengthy, honey blonde hair pulled into a braid which cascaded over her shoulder, striking a contrast with her plain, green robe. He seethed, teeth clenching. Her companions – a half elven woman, a Kara-Turan, a human knight, a red haired halfling and a large, bald warrior – entered shortly after her, their weapons drawn and gleaming. There was no way he was getting out of this alive._

 _Despite the odds, Valygar stood his ground; he would not die without dignity. "Ho there! More Cowled ones come to kill me, no doubt. Who are you?"_

 _The young mage's brown eyes met his, "The Cowled Wizards have sent me to kill you, yes, but I'm not so foolish to follow their demands so blindly."_

 _The dark skinned ranger eyed the girl warily as she turned to her companions to order them to sheath their weapons, "Why should I trust you, mage?"_

 _She turned back to him and flashed a smile, "Peace, friend. I'm not going to harm you, I swear it. I have no love for those bastards." The venom in her tone amused him; evidently she was no friend of the Cowled Wizards either. He allowed himself a small smirk, "Now, why are they chasing you? I'm aware that you killed two of their number, but I assume there is a lot more to it. Tell me."_

 _Sheathing his katana, he motioned for the group to enter his sanctuary._

* * *

Valygar raised a hand to caress her cheek, his eyes holding a gentle gaze, "I am. I'm shocking even myself. But just think, we could go to the border of Athkatla, get married, exchange vows, wear the rings. What... what do you say?" Feeling his courage begin to slip, his eyes frantically searched her face as his eyebrows drew together.

Kaylee laughed suddenly, a blissful, carefree sound as she took his face in her hands, kissing him briefly, her eyes shining, "Valygar! By Lathander, yes!"

How could she refuse? She had come to love this man so deeply and fully it made her heart ache to think of such a future. They had come so far together, sharing so much and building their friendship steadily from the very first.

* * *

 _Lavok lay dead, his final wish to see the sky before his death was granted. Valygar stood over his corpse, a crease forming between his dark brows._

" _He's gone. I'll admit I'm surprised at how all of this turned out. Could such a man have been redeemed? Even after all the chaos his foul, evil magic wrought?"_

 _Kaylee lay a hand on his own in an attempt to comfort him, her voice gentle but firm, "Not all magic is evil, my friend.. But to answer your question yes, it may be the optimist in me but despite what blood others may have flowing through their veins, it is usually whether or not they give in to the sway of it is what truly matters."_

 _They had had this discussion multiple times on the road, Kaylee speaking of her sister and her ability to control the magic she had learned. He had, in turn, spoken of his parents and the horrid night he was forced to slay both of his parents due to his mother's necromancy driven insanity and her selfish disregard for his father's state of undeath. Despite their different opinions on the subject of magic, they had managed to share their views with one another without fear and had slowly formed a gentle companionship in the short time they had travelled together._

 _Valygar regarded his companion with a small amount of interest - her wisdom far surpassed her age. He knew of the divine blood that ran in her veins, and she had shown exceptional control over it, doing good deeds and avoiding conflict where possible, rather than bringing death and destruction that others who had shared Bhaal's essence had wrought._

" _Hmm. True enough. It seems I have not seen as much of the world as I thought I had. I would like to continue travelling with you if you will allow me."_

 _Kaylee smiled warmly, trying to hide her anticipation, "Of course, Valygar. I- We would be happy to have you with us." Suddenly bashful, the mage averted her eyes from the man in front of her as he offered a small smile and a nod. She had recognised her attraction for her newest companion days into their journey and had tried to ignore it since, but realised that it was a futile effort._

 _Later that night, as he shared an ale with her at the Copper Coronet he had apologised for his misgivings about her own magic. She had smiled at him, telling him that there was nothing to apologise for and that she could understand his doubts. She told him of Gorion's teachings, her fondness of the man and how she missed his gentle guidance. Kaylee told him of her time in Candlekeep, of Imoen and her pranks and of her travels on the Sword Coast. She confided her frustrations in Khalid's death and her sister's capture by the Cowled Wizards. Valygar had, in turn, shared the happier memories of his childhood: the time his father had his first bow made for his tenth birthday, the first time he had gone tracking, the moments his mother would take care of him when he was ill as a child with cool hands and a loving smile. They had shared hurts and warm memories until they realised that they were the only patrons left in the room, and, with an apology to a very tired but amused Hendak, bid each other good night._

 _Their last thoughts before succumbing to sleep revolving around how easy they it had been to share in each other's company._

* * *

Her admission made him laugh, a rich, loud sound that echoed throughout the campsite, "Your enthusiasm flatters me!"

His laughter infectious, Kaylee began to giggle herself. It was good to see him so happy.

"Valygar, while I am pleased to hear you laugh for once, some quiet, if you please! There are some who are trying to sleep!"

"I agree with the Druid."

Valygar chuckled, "My apologies, Jaheira. Sarevok." His expression turned sombre as he turned his face to his lover, taking her small, pale hands in his own dark ones, "I..." he dropped his eyes to their joined hands, gathering the courage to speak, "I want to ride with you along the coast. Or better, on a boat as the sun sets." Taking a deep breath to steel himself, he lifted his gaze to her eyes, "I want to make love to you on cool, white sheets. Call you mine. Hear you call me yours."

Kaylee's eyes filled with tears, her voice quavering as she whispered, "Oh, Valygar. I would want nothing more than to call you my husband, and hear you call me your wife."

Instinctively raised her hand to the pendant that rested on her breast, the Corthala necklace that Valygar had gifted her several months ago.

* * *

 _Drying her hair with a cloth, Kaylee bathed in the warm glow of the fireplace, dressed in a simple white sleeping shift, her battle garb hanging on the desk chair of the room so that it could dry. Making the detour through the Umar Hills for a while before taking to Rhynn Lanthorn to Elthan was a good idea. They needed at least one uninterrupted night of sleep before confronting Irenicus, exhausted as they were. She had gone with Valygar to his cabin as per his strange request but, as luck would have it, it had begun to rain heavily the last few moments of the journey and did not look as though it had hopes of relenting any time soon. The sky was already darkening; the pair decreed that the rest of the party would have to wait for them at the inn, as per Jaheira's initial suggestion._

 _Kaylee's heart leapt at the prospect of sharing a cabin alone with her dark skinned companion, as it often did when she thought of the ranger. His declaration of his love for her in the Underdark had her stunned. She had never dreamed he would return her feelings, however, much to her frustration, he still denied the possibility of a relationship between them, based on his vow that there would never again be a Corthala to carry his supposed curse. Kaylee had accepted this reluctantly, understanding his wish, though her heart had soared at his admission. If she was to love him from a far, then so be it; she was content enough that he continued to offer his friendship._

 _The hesitant knock on the door broke her train of thoughts, "I'm decent, Valygar. Come in."_

 _Kaylee tried to keep her breathing even when the ranger entered; he wore a green loose fitting, short sleeved tunic that left his arms bare and brown breaches._ By Lathander, this is torture, _she thought. Seeing him without the hardened leathers he wore made her curse her resolve of accepting friendship._

 _He offered her a steaming mug, "I thought some tea might help to warm us. Sit with me a while."_

 _Nodding, she joined him on the rug by the fire, grateful for the heat of the fire disguising her blush for warmth. They sat together for a time, gazing into the fire, speaking of their plans for the morrow and drinking their tea. For a moment Kaylee was able to forget that her soul was missing, and she felt she could breathe easier._

" _You've been a good friend. Possibly the best I've ever had."_

" _Well, aside from the time I nearly killed you as the Slayer, I'm sure I have been." Kaylee joked._

 _Valygar chuckled, then suddenly turned serious, "I have something that I would like you to have." He rose and opened the desk draw. When he turned to her, he held a silver chain with a pendant: a rose in full bloom. A golden topaz adorned it centre._

" _This was my mother's. She had it passed to her from her mother, as she had receive it from her mother before her. It's enchanted against spells. It should be of use in the battle against Irenicus, and, well, I would like to give it to you."_

 _Moved, Kaylee felt her eyes prickle with tears, "Valygar, I..."_

 _Shaking his head, Valygar rejoined her on the floor, sitting on his knees, "The Corthala line must end with me, you know this." He sighed, defeated, feeling his courage beginning to slip, "Please, Kaylee. Take it. It would make me happy to know someone I care for was in possession of it. And I would feel better that you had an extra level of protection for whatever we may face." He undid the clasp and motioned for her to allow him to put it on her._

 _Not trusting herself to speak, she nodded, gathering her hair away from her neck as he fastened it, his slightly trembling fingers brushing her collarbone softly as he did so, making her breath hitch. He drew back and regarded the necklace with a wistful expression, shuddering out a sigh, "The gem matches your eyes. If things were different, if I were not cursed and you were not a Bhaalspawn..." he rose abruptly, "Rest, Kaylee. You'll need your wits about you tomorrow." He turned to leave, but Kaylee's hand grasped his quickly._

" _Wait, Valygar." Her voice was small, "I... I have a favour to ask you."_

" _...Yes?"_

" _Kiss me."_

 _His heart stopped. He swore it did, "Kaylee-"_

" _I know this won't change things between us. I understand. I've accepted that friendship is the closest I'll ever get to you. I have the knowledge that you love me, and that I love you. And it's_ enough _." He turned to her then, saw the blush that dusted her face as she looked up at him and sighed. Just as he thought he could say something, she spoke again._

" _But it's just... Throughout all of my travels, I've never met anyone like you. Never felt anything close to this. And... I've... I've never..." She faltered._

" _You've never been kissed before." he offered. She nodded, glancing away in embarrassment._

" _And tomorrow... tomorrow I may die. We all may. And that frightens me. I just wanted to have this to carry with me. I ask nothing more of you, I promise. Just... just one kiss." Her nervous smile, the one she had donned in an attempt to try and mask her fear, had him trapped._

 _Wordlessly, he cupped her face and searched her face for a moment before capturing her lips with his own, kissing her tenderly. Her lips were impossibly soft, and Valygar closed his eyes, feeling his resolve crumbling when they slid inexpertly across his. Kaylee sighed into his mouth, and he slowly slipped his tongue inside, deepening the kiss, drawing a soft gasp from her._

 _Heated as it was getting, it was not hurried, and Kaylee's inexperience tongue joined his own, twining together in a slow, sensual dance._ _She brought her hands up to caress the small of his back shyly, a fluttering feeling settling in her heart and stomach. It was much more intense than she was expecting, and when she felt Valygar's arm slide around her waist, burying his hand in her hair and drawing her closer to him, she swore that even if she were to die in the confrontation against Irenicus, she would do so happily. Realising this was her only chance to show Valygar how she felt without words, she clung to the ranger, pressing her lips more insistently to his._

 _Valygar groaned, his heartbeat erratic, belatedly noticing how their bodies were tightly pressed together, only her thin shift and his tunic separating their skin, one of his hands resting on the small of her back while the other had buried itself in her hair, and her grip on his back had become tantalisingly firm. It was too much; the fire, the kiss, her body so close to him..._

 _Breathlessly, he slowly tapered off the kiss, resting his forehead against hers. It was a long time before he trusted himself to speak._

" _I'm sorry." The deep, husky tone of his voice surprised even him, "But that is all I can give you."_

 _Kaylee sighed, her eyes still closed, "Thank you, Valygar."_

 _They drew apart slowly, reluctantly, and bid each other good night, Valygar taking the spare mattress set up in the storage room._

 _Upon waking, a brilliant yellow wild rose sat on her pillow, its meaning not escaping her. Smiling to herself, she dressed, threading it into her braid, donning the necklace Valygar had gifted her and set out to find the ranger, her hope that they would win the battle against Irenicus renewed._

* * *

Valygar's gaze dropped to the Corthala necklace that adorned her neck, "I never imagined such happiness possible." he whispered, seemingly to himself.

Kaylee brought her hand to his face, bringing his attention to her face, "Nor I, love."

"Let's keep it a secret. Tell not a soul. Run off as soon as we can, when your quest is completed, and there is no more Bhaal or Aulando's prophecies. Just the two of us."

The prospect was thrilling to say the least, and for once, it _would_ be nice for the two of them to have something to call their own. Much like they had done little over a tenday ago...

* * *

" _Where are we going, Valygar?" Kaylee laughed as they raced through the forest. They had just defeated Sendai, deciding to set up camp in the copse of trees rather than rest inside the pocket plane._

 _Valygar's grip on her hand tightened a fraction as they hurried along, "We're almost there. I can hear it. Ah!"_

 _It was a small lake, with a running waterfall, surrounded by a dense thicket of trees. Fireflies flickered in the moonlight, and all that could be heard were the various calls of the birds settling in for the night._

" _Care for a swim?"_

 _Kaylee glanced at her friend, who had begun to take his boots off, his weapons already discarded. "Oh, absolutely! Just let me know if you see any Fire Giants, Drow, or the like, ranger. I would like to, you know, die with some of my dignity intact." She winked and if not for his dark skin or the lack of light she could have sworn he was blushing judging by his bashful expression._

 _After her boots, cloak and robes were discarded, she glanced at Valygar, immediately regretting her decision. He was in the process of removing his undershirt, his sculpted muscles rippling under his scarred torso as he pulled the garment over his head. His eyes met hers, and she blushed furiously, averting her eyes and idly pulling at the laces of her own shirt. He chuckled._

" _Are you coming in, my lady? Or are you just going to stand here and watch?" he teased, smirking at her discomfort. Kaylee mock glared at him, tore her shirt off and threw it in his direction. Laughing, Valygar handed the shirt back to her. Suddenly his mirth was gone as, all while maintaining eye contact, she stepped out of her leggings, leaving her in her underclothes. His throat suddenly went dry._

 _Kaylee quirked an eyebrow, "Now who is staring, ranger?" before he could answer, however, she ran towards the water, throwing herself in without her usual grace, completely unprepared for the chill as she went under. She resurfaced, spluttering, "Ah! It's so cold!"_

 _A chuckle from behind her forced her to turn around, "I'm glad you find this amusing!"_

" _I thought you would be glad to revisit one of your, what was it, 'favourite pastimes'?"_

 _Speechless, she splashed him in retaliation. Wiping the water off his face, he stared at her, eyebrow raised in bemusement, "Oh-hoh, very mature." He smirked, and Kaylee did not like the look of mischief that crossed his normally stoic face, "Can the lady handle the consequences of her actions?" he swam towards her intently._

" _Ooooohhhh no, nonononono, Valy-"_

 _The last of his name was cut off as he dunked her under the cold water. She came spluttering to the surface, her hair a total mess and completely soaked. "Oh you will_ pay _for that, ranger!"_

 _They continued to swim about in the water, splashing and laughing, until, on Kaylee's insistence, they agreed that they should make their way back to the camp. Emerging from the water they approached where their clothing lay, but before Kaylee could do anything, Valygar took her arm and hushed her._

" _Look! An owl. Can you see it?" Leaning over her shoulder, he pointed to the tree canopy, where the bird leapt from its perch, wings spread in flight, "There it goes! A magnificent bird."_

 _Kaylee sighed, allowing herself to lean against Valygar's chest, "It's beautiful..."_

" _It is..." his whispered voice was so close, so, so close and suddenly he leaned forward and placed a kiss on the bare skin of her shoulder, resting his forehead in the crook of her neck. Kaylee shivered, no longer cold but suddenly very warm, when Valygar spoke, his normally stoic voice thick with emotion._

" _Kaylee, our adventure is drawing to a close. There will be more to come, but will we face them together?" His voice dropped to a whisper, " Or will you disappear, ascend, ride into the sunset, and we'll be apart forevermore?"_

" _V-Valygar, I..."_

" _Kaylee, I love you."_

 _She gasped, glad tears springing from her eyes as she closed them, "As I love you. Valygar, but-"_

 _Suddenly he was before her, kissing her soundly, before pulling away, his brown eyes intense and dark, "I will not hide my heart from you any longer. I can't. It's killing me, and I feel like I'm doing what Yaga Sura was doing; locking a part of myself away from the world. From you. Kaylee, be with me tonight. Let's just forget everything. We'll be fighting dragons, or drow, or who knows what else tomorrow. Let me make love to you, show you how much I care."_

" _But, your vow of celibacy..."_

 _His expression fell, and she cursed her traitorous mouth for uttering the words until he offered a small, ironic smile, his answering words earnest, "I find myself not caring about it at all right this second, and being apart from you is fast becoming far too much to bear..."_

 _It was all she could do to kiss him in response. Too much, it was too much. Her heart was pounding, was this really happening? After almost a year of loving the ranger from afar and it was mere days from discovering what her destiny held for her, that they were finally allowing themselves to love one another openly. It seemed almost cruel, but Kaylee no longer found herself caring. Circumstances be damned._

 _Pouring her heart and soul into the kiss, she felt the tears fall from her eyes. They each made quick work of their smalls and were laying next to each other in moments on the drying cloth that Valygar had hastily thrown down, gently stroking and caressing each other with trembling hands._

 _Like their first kiss, their lovemaking was unhurried; the sensual dance began with slow caresses and kisses so gentle and reverent Kaylee could weep. They came together slowly, Kaylee feeling an initial sting at the intrusion that was soothed by Valygar's gentle kisses, the normally stoic rangers voice breaking with raw emotion as he whispered his love to her. When it was over, they lay together, whispering sweet nothings to each other and sighing in contentment between kisses._

 _When they returned to camp, dried and dressed, Valygar carrying her in his arms, Imoen jumped to her feet, her expression concerned._

" _Heeeeyyyyy. What happened?!"_

"' _mfine, Immy." Kaylee muttered._

" _Fine my ass! What did you do Mister Broodypants? If you hurt her I-"_

" _Oh, Im, not to worry. Zero harm done here." She gazed up at her lover, smiling softly as he did the same._

 _Imoen's eyes widened to comical proportions, throwing her hands up to halt any other remarks, "Oh, ew. Nope, don't wanna know." Then she glared, suddenly serious, "But mark my words, Vals, if you hurt my little big sister, there will be hell to pay!"_

 _It was all he could do to nod his head gravely in response._

* * *

"Imoen's gonna kill me. I always promised that she would be my maid of honor at my wedding." Kaylee chortled, "But yes. Let's do it. Just us."

Valygar's bright smile brought a fresh wave of tears to her eyes. Drawing her face forwards to rest her forehead against his own, she sighed, closing her eyes, "I love you, Valygar."

Valygar sighed, utterly content, "And I, you, lady. My lady Corthala..."

"Kiss me."

And he did.


End file.
